As if there wasn't enough going on. . .

We had to admit James to a psych hospital yesterday after Sally left.  He wasn't taking his meds and was not doing well at all.  The doctor today said to expect him to be there around a week to get him stable again.  

He's at a different hospital than the last time, because this one is much closer to home and none of us are up for the trip to the other facility every single night. 

My last chemo is Monday 7/13, and it looks like James will still be inpatient unless he gets better more quickly than they expect. 

We request your prayers for our family!!  Thanks.

Currently Traditions & Classics By The University of Missouri Symphonic Wind Ensemble see related

Blessings and sadness

Feeling sad this morning.  Sally has been here since June 23 and has been a tremendous help to us.  She's leaving early Tuesday, and I'm having a hard time with her going back home.  Until she got here, I hadn't realized how sick I've really been.  And no, having her here hasn't made me sick.   It's just having someone with energy to do the work around the house that I can't made me realize how little energy I've had for so long.  It seems like years since the house has been this clean, and everyone in the family has been appreciating it. 

Sally has also made more meals for us than I usually do, even when I'm well.  It's going to be hard on all of us to go back to our status quo.  I think I'll be accepting a lot more help from church and friends than I had been before.  As I've told John many times, I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired. 

It was a major accomplishment Friday that I made dinner -- spaghetti and meatballs from frozen meatballs, jarred spaghetti sauce and angel hair pasta.  And I was wiped out afterward.  Sally cleaned up the kitchen while I sat in my chair.    She says she doesn't mind, and I'm sure she doesn't.  I appreciate her so much. 

I think it's harder to be left than to leave, if you know what I mean.  If I was leaving her home to return to mine, I think I'd still be sad, but not as much as I am now. 

I'll get through it.  I always do.  It's just no fun.

Whammo

Holey moley.  This has been a whopper of a chemo cycle.  I'm just now getting toward feeling like I'll survive.  It's taken longer this time than previously -- I think.  It's hard to keep track of how long I feel like death warmed over.  All I know is that it's almost worse having that week of feeling normal because of how bad I feel the next 2 weeks.  Praise God, I've only got to do this 2 more times.  June 22 and July 13. 

As I told Grant on the phone, I've been wondering about whether I've been giving my cat an involuntary course of chemotherapy.  She has been staying right up against me since March.  If I'm at home, she's on me somehow, either on my neck, legs, shoulder, etc.  I wonder if I excrete the chemicals through my skin.  I'll have to ask the oncologist next time I see him.  I don't think her vet would be able to answer the question.  She doesn't seem to be sick, but she's still sneezing all the time.

One of the drugs is apparently so toxic that the nurse wears a special gown, puts a barrier between my arm and the IV connection, and checks several times to be sure the stuff is going into the vein, not into the tissues.  She has to put it in via special syringes rather than an IV drip, and it's dyed a putrid red.  I'm amazed my veins are able to handle this gunk.  It burns going in sometimes, and the nurse has to slow down.  I drink ice water and suck on ice while I'm getting this one because after 2 weeks I get sores in my mouth from it.  The cold constricts the blood vessels and keeps it from doing as much damage.  Last cycle, I didn't get the cold under my tongue, and that's where I got sores.  This time, I only got 2 small sores on my tongue, instead of deep cracks in it.  Sorry if this is too much information.  I suspect if I don't write about this while it's going on, I won't remember it later. 

Ongoing treatment

Currently Anguished English: An Anthology of Accidental Assaults Upon Our Language By Richard Lederer see related

Food for thought?

I listen to a show on NPR called A Way With Words.  Today someone who was on the show asked about the use of the phrase "the wreck of the Hesperus".  He said his mom and aunt would describe a mess as the wreck of the Hesperus. 

So, as I was driving along, I started to think about phrases people use to express their intent to confront someone.  (In the interests of simplicity and since I have sons, I'm going to use the male gender as my reference.)

"I'm going to tell him how the cow ate the cabbage!"

"I'm going to give him a piece of my mind."

"I'm going to chew him up one side and down the other."

"His *ss is grass and I'm the lawnmower."

"I'm going to read him the riot act."

"I'm going to give him an ear full."

"I'm going to give him what for."

Any other examples you can think of?  I was trying to remember more, and drew a blank.